Former Mini-Tour Player
Who Are You?
Over the last few months I have been approached with an alarming number of conversations on the subject of what are people like in other parts of the world, How were you treated overseas? How’s Australia? What are you trying to accomplish? When is your next trip and where do you play? The frequency of these conversations left me with self analysis questions of my own.
80% of these brain picking intrusions were thrust upon me while I practiced my golf game. An additional oddity was each person, male and female, stood 5 to 20 feet away watching me chip and pitch balls and I could feel them waiting for the moment to stop me and engage with a statement or question. Here are a few additional opening lines… “Do you mind if I watch?”(Polite).”You must practice a lot”(Stupid). “How do you do that?”(Flattering).
“If I could chip like that I’d be a Pro” (Insult).”Are you working on something?” (Stupid). “Who taught you that?” (Insult–had to be there.) “There’s another chipping green in the back you can use if you get in your car and drive to the other side of the course. (Helpful, maybe). And the all time frequent favorite: “Who are you? (Priceless)”.
Not all of these “ice breakers” are meant to be unkind though you can see that they can be. They have been preludes to a wanting to know. This is an inquisitive nature of golfers, fans of the game, and people in general. A curiosity for many and a territorial trespass check for others.
The more you improve in this game, the more you understand that the mental aspect is paramount. Consequently people must inquire to find out if you are intelligent, approachable, and are willing to share a tip or two. Or, they wish to impose upon you what they think to be correct about a golf shot and ultimately screw with your thought process, and yes that’s the same person who will purposely try and get in your head on the course in order to beat you.
The obvious truth is he or she, simply wants your story, your mentality, your personality, first hand. For reasons of security, comfort, trust, association, or to simply find a friend or share a laugh. They want to know who you are!! This inquisition is not just for the professional golfer, though that can be a pretty reliable source for information about the swing and the mental aspect of the game, it applies to interactions with all people, it applies to life.
Many people today practice, putt, and chip with an IPod in their ears and ignore whom they want without being rude or so the excuse, “I didn’t hear you” cancels the rudeness. Many people purposely place a scowl on their face to avoid others and when asked about it they retort, “This is how I look.” –I’ve never doubted that one simply because a true smile is never mistaken.
Are we that fearful as a people, that we must frown at others to avoid conversation, literally hide in public with headphones or straight ignore a person because of our own bias yet open our arms when we learn that we have a mutual friend? Is your life really that important and busy, forcing you to judge a person you don’t know? Or are the secrets you and your family consistently hide, stuff, ignore or think is impervious to you, choking you and shutting down the wonderful gifts of being human and human interaction?
Is your life seriously “All That” to the degree you acquire a pet dog, nurture it, feed it, clothe it, take it to the vet, walk it and pick up its excrement with your hand and a bag yet, you have trouble saying hello with a smile to your neighbor another human being?
SERIOUSLY? There is a saying that states “You are as sick as your secrets.” So again I ask, “Who are you?”
When it comes to life and golf, I tell on myself, I tell who I am. Not just for the person looking on or asking questions, I tell for my health, truths and peace of mind….TRY IT!!
I recently decided to return to Australia and play competitively and many people of that country, some of whom I met in 2009, and my wonderful recent family there, left me with no false sense of being. What I mean by that is there were few motives, hidden agendas and smokescreens when initially meeting an individual.
One can argue that all people of the world have motives and agendas and are the same. I will argue, NOT TRUE. Certainly I am not pitting the differences of the countries together with a debate of comparison, I’m simply telling my experiences and there is a difference that will make you smile.
Hopefully you will find the time to visit and experience a different joy. From the weather year-round to the wonderful golf courses that will challenge you. Marvelous food in abundance and costal views that will calm your soul. The beaches actually brought joyous tears to my eyes with their powerful calm. Contact me when you arrive in Australia and I’ll promise a round of golf, a hello, and a smile no matter WHO you are!!!
Be good to you so that you can be good to others.
I am truly grateful to share with you my thoughts and my experiences. And I’m grateful that you take the time to read my Blogs.
To my readers:
Be good to you!!!
All the best,
Vern Burns
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